It's All Fun and Games...Until Marvin the Martian Flips You Off...

Today I was driving to work and noticed that the car ahead of me had a bumper sticker on it comprised of Marvin the Martian flipping the bird. Normally, I probably wouldn't even have noticed this...but since my promise to Chuck, I seem to have a heightened sense for detecting middle fingers. (Again, this may be some form of super power...but if it is, it isn't a real useful one. "Oh, so you can turn invisible, fly and stop bullets with your mind...big whoop! I can tell when little Johnny is giving someone the middle finger 12 blocks away!")

Of course, once I noticed this bumper sticker I had to stay true to my word and get REALLY angry. So, taking Maria's advice, I got REALLY angry and looked for something big to throw. The biggest thing within range seemed to be my car...so...at the next light, I came to a complete stop...waited for the appropriate time to launch my vehicle of death into the air and onto Marvin, and then...like the huge wuss that I am, I simply drove away.

Did I get really angry? Technically no. Did I throw something big at the guy? Also technically a no. But as I drove casually past his car, I think he got my message.

Hmmm...I just had an idea...I need to find that bumper sticker, and put it on the front of my car. That way if I ever see that guy again, I can give him a taste of his own medicine.

My New Promise...

For Charles' sake I am promising to, from this point on, get REALLY angry if anyone "flips me off". I mean REALLY angry...the kind of angry where your head almost explodes. (I didn't really want to put in the word "almost" but of course if my head DID explode then I'd be dead. Unless of course I had some super power where I could grow a new one...like that guy in the "Men in Black" movies. However, as super powers go...I don't think that's on the top of my list).

Speaking of "the bird", that brings up an funny memory. When I was growing up, my best friend's dad wanted to teach his son that the middle finger didn't inherently mean something bad. In order to accomplish this, he told his son that it meant "Merry Christmas". So whenever he would drive by us, he would give us "the finger", and we would return it back to him and shout "Merry Christmas!" Thinking back on it now, I have to wonder what the neighbors all thought of us when they witness it. Of course, one things for sure...they could be confident that we weren't 12 killer seals armed with rocket launchers.

New Improved Nyquill...We're Hoping It Doesn't Kill You This Time!

So this past Tuesday morning I began to have that "oh no, I think I'm getting sick" feeling. You know the one I'm talking about. I'm sure the "feelings" are different for everyone, but in my case there are certian things that start to happen...and when they do, I can usually be pretty certain that I am about to take a turn for the worst. Which I did...

By Tuesday evening I was contemplating hiring a hitman to put me out of my misery. In fact, by late evening I had a fever that got so out of control that I actually started to Hallucinate. (Which is something that hasn't happened to me since I was a child). And to make matters worse, we really didn't have any appropriate medicine in the house to counter this...so I just had to suffer through it until Wednesday morning when the stores re-opened.

Yesterday, my loving wife headed off to the pharmacy to pick me up some medicine. The process she went through probably took awhile, especially since the list of symptoms I expressed didn't really match any of those listed on the boxes. ("Hmmm...let's see...this one deals with fever, this one deals with sore throats...excuse me, do any of these deal with 'my whole body feels like it is being stabbed by a savage army of imps'?) Anyway...long story short, she chose DayQuill/NyQuill liguid caps.

First, let me commend the good people over at "Quill" for a terrific product that so far is helping alot. (Please send check or money order for endorsement to...)

However, the real thing I want to highlight here is what I noticed on the box...in bold letters it said "New Formula". Which kinda got me thinking, because I wasn't sure how I felt about it...

For starters, it didn't have the word "Improved" in there anywhere...so am I supposed to be happy about this new formula? I mean maybe the new formula is actually half as effective so that you need to take more of them, which in turn increases sales for the company. If that's the case, then I hate the new formula!

Secondly, it makes me wonder what was wrong with the "old formula"? Especially since I have taken it on occassion. Was there some crazy side effect to it? Like, perhaps it could turn you into a rabbit or worse...kill you? (Hmmm...is death REALLY worse then being turned into a rabbit?)

Finally, it made me a little nervous about what they DIDN'T know about the "new formula". I mean, the old one worked pretty well...but apparently could turn you into a rabbit...but what can the new one do? Which brings me to the main reason for this post...if you see the following:

- A human sized rabbit (hopefully sans fever).
- A leprechaun with a head made out of Lucky Charms.
- 12 Killer seals armed with rocket launchers.
- She-Ra.

...don't be alarmed. It's just me, after the side effects from the "new formula". PLEASE don't shoot me...that will not help me get better.

(On second thought, you probably SHOULD be alarmed if you see 12 Killer Seals armed with rocket launchers...10 or 11 is no cause for panic...but 12...that's scary).